And on one fine day..13th Sept '08

Saturday evening, 13th September, Central Park, Connaught Place (CP), Delhi-
There was a blast and a wisp of smoke, people shouting, utter chaos. Me and my friend, we were leaning on the railing in Central Park overlooking that area in CP where the blasts took place simultaneously.
The first blast, I thought, we all thought, it was some power failure, something to do with electricity. There was this certain apprehension though in the faces that I could see around me. The second blast, fire, people shouting, chaos, confusion, fear, more people shouting, people running, panic, heart thumping, not knowing what to do, not knowing where to run, not knowing where the next blast would take place, not knowing anything, numb, watching people running and shouting.
It was then that my friend suggested we make a move, he, specifically suggesting that a safe distance be kept from the dustbins placed all around the park. People were moving fast towards the park exit gates. Thinking it was best not to move with the crowd we sidetracked and moved towards the open green grass by jumping over the tall hedge. Police were soon all over the place, urging people to move out from the park. Once outside, there was more confusion. I saw faces etched with fear probably mirroring what were there on mine. Cars were making a beeline to move out quickly from the area, people were calling out for auto rickshaws and taxis, people were running. We too were moving quickly, and in all this, I was wondering, this is how people feel when faced with a threat to their lives, confusion and fear, apprehension, a sinking feeling of fearing what’s next.
Hearts still thumping we entered a restaurant on the first floor, thinking it was the safest place at the moment. From the restaurant window we observed, how in a few minutes the crowded area gave a deserted look when the shops put its shutters down and the parking lot which was normally crowded with people fighting for spaces gave a blank look.
It was then, that calls started pouring in from family and friends. Reassuring all was fine, though not particularly stressing my location to some at that moment, I put their fears to rest. Funny, never for a moment did the thought of checking up with my cousins and friends in the city occur in my mind. I guess I was too involved worrying about myself, wondering how I would reach home with all means of conveyance practically impossible, of course, besides the Delhi Metro. And that was my last option, infact, I hadn’t considered it as an option until I realised that all other means of conveyance was unavailable. At last, fearing the worst, we boarded the Metro train and thankfully reached home safely. Happy ending for me, at least. Me, me, me…what about all the others affected? I see it in the papers and cringe at the thought, thinking that could have been me.

got to admit..what?

I wish he was around, miss him.

And here's a packet for you!!

Unable to sleep, I was loitering on the terrace late one night when suddenly there was thunder and lightning and a packet labeled "Authentic Ambrosia" landed on my feet. Alarmed, I looked around. No, there was no-one besides me and the starry sky. There was no sign indicating that there was a thunderous clashing of the clouds some few seconds back. Was it my imagination? Was I too drunk on my thoughts? Again I looked down, the packet was still there. Taking for granted that it was meant for me, I clutched the packet tightly and bubbling with excitement headed to my room.
Once, within the confines of my haven, impatiently I stripped bare the cover and inside it...to my dismay...I found nothing. There was nothing besides colorful scraps of rugged paper. I felt stupid. Stupid that in this modern age and times, I somehow dared to believe in immortality. I was pretty sure that there was some reality show, a hidden camera somewhere through which everyone was having fun at my expense.
What if it was a bomb? Paranoid, I was all ready to throw the packet when I noticed a shiny object amidst the colorful papers. Curious, I touched it. It was hard and transparent, like water made into a tiny ball. It looked more like a marble with which we used to play as kids. Ambrosia…I expected it to be a green twig with lots of tiny fresh leaves all over it. Fearing the worst, I licked the marble…Uhuh…tasteless, no thunderstorm, no unexpected nothing. Carelessly, I popped it into my mouth, confirmed for sure, that some prank was being played on me when the marble dissolved immediately in my mouth leaving a fresh mint-like flavor. I got scared. I expected the worst. Could someone try to poison me? Reeling with disbelief, I called up my folks…said I loved them. Prayed for forgiveness and then waited for the inevitable. Two minutes…nothing, five minutes…nothing, ten minutes…nothing. I tidied my room. Waited...nothing. It was then that I realized that whatever I had taken, ambrosia or not, was not poison. I was not sure whether I was relieved or not to this discovery since there was a tiny portion of me that believed that I had indeed taken the ambrosia, the mystic fruit for immortality. For the first time after having taken it, lets say "fruit", joy crept into my heart. I was immortal. I could now afford to have time to climb the Great Wall of China, swim in the Dead Sea, go for Bungee Jumping, learn to face the waves without fearing death and maybe, just maybe try to handle the slippery, slimy, oh-so-disgusting snakes. I imagined earning, saving and backpacking around the globe…reaching every corner and afford to have the time to indulge in learning everything about the strange foreign lands. I imagined life on being 20ish forever…hale and hearty with not a care in the world. Gloating on the new-found glut of opportunities coming my way, I sat down on my study table and started making a list of things I wanted to do….While I was busy noting down my wish list, an unknown fear crept in and lodged somewhere inside of me. It hit me that I wouldn’t have my family around me for long. My friends would marry, have children, have loads of grandchildren, hopefully enjoy the autumn phase of their life and die gracefully while I would forever be young. Young and healthy. Young and wise. Young and knowledgeable. Young and tired…
I was now terrified with the complicated turn of events that I was to expect. I needed fresh air fast, urgently. I rushed to the terrace again and with my heart in my mouth, I decided to jump just to test whether I was really immortal. Just then, I decided to leave a note to my folks in case something tragic happened. I didn’t know then what was more tragic…dying or immortality. I feared that I wouldn’t have enough courage to jump once I sat down to write. So then, I stood up on the railing, looked at the moonless starry sky, closed my eyes and one, two three…I jumped.
I jumped expecting the warm late summer breeze to blow harshly across my face.

And then, like you’d already known from the start, it was all a dream.
I was mortal. I am mortal. If someone were to give me the fruit, I wouldn’t have taken it…I don’t know…Would I??? ….Would you???

those few seconds...

While switching on your beloved computer,you sometimes see the black screen and the seconds left for your computer to start automatically, well that happened to me right now and like most people I was way too impatient and almost hit the F8 key which would not have helped me much!
While I was waiting for the seconds to drag, I realised how those few seconds were important to me while I was out there writing out my examination papers, while I was out there trying to beat my friend in swimming underwater...those few seconds meant a lot..still means a lot! This obvious revelation hits us only when its least expected and to think that we do stuff to "kill time"..Ouch!! that hurts!!....a lot!

destination unknown

cars zooming, people getting impatient for the light to turn green
everyone's in a hurry, everyone's rushing ahead
pushing and pulling each other
trying to grab that seat in the bus
where are we all heading?where are we going?

mask

Over the years, I have decided that the saying…“first impression is the last impression” is totally false. I am pretty sure that this is not a revelation to many many people out there. One decides about the other person on the first meeting itself and carries on that image until the next meeting. I know people say they do not judge people…that we are in no condition to judge people…But this is so untrue.
Someone may seem all rosy and goody goody at first, but you never know what’s behind that mask. The other may seem pretty detached and may appear proud and arrogant when in fact that person may be observant, shy, thoughtful human being. Whatever, I am glad I’ve learnt not to form opinions about people until I really know them…and just in case if anyone asks me for an opinion and I am not sure about it, I’d be diplomatic…not for fear of hurting someone, but infact to judge myself, for my own benefit.
I am selfish!!! :)

Superstition

One of my favorite moments is looking up at the night sky…
As we were loitering around in the school campus during my school days, suddenly my friend jumped up, touched her ear, closed her eyes and was silent for sometime. Seeing me surprised, she explained that whenever one sees a lone star in the sky, one should touch gold and make a wish. I guess that explained why she touched her ear, since she was wearing gold earrings. I just laughed at her that instant, but since then, whenever I see a lone star I make a silent wish.
While in school, I usually accompanied my father in his morning walks. We were out in the streets before there was any hint of daylight. It was then that I got to see shooting stars…I had heard that when one sees such an amazing spectacle, one should make a wish. It was then no wonder that I made a wish. I still do.
Superstitions…which have been coming down from ages still pretty much dominate our lives. Some few days back in the city, as I was returning home with my cousin in an auto rickshaw, we almost jerked out of the vehicle when the driver brought it to a sudden halt. Seeing our angry faces, he quickly explained that a black cat just crossed the road and he couldn’t afford to continue driving. Thankfully, another car drove past us and we continued to our destination. If I start taking note of such superstitions, am sure that the list is endless. With every step, there is some kind of superstition attached. I tell the world I do not believe in superstitions, save the star one, but then that makes me superstitious again.
Where did all these come from? There must have been a logical reason when it all first started. Like for instance, in my part of the world, when we were kids we used to hear that whoever eats more of vegetables than rice, then that person is unlucky. During the bygone days, maybe there was shortage of vegetables and a logical solution would be to introduce such an approach as a superstition!